9 hours ago
29 September, 2015
In three weeks time, I will be half way through my first day back at work, after five months of maternity leave. To say that emotions are running high...is a bit of an under statement - I just cried my eyes out all the way home from the shops - how the hell did five months go so quickly?
The thing is,..a part of me is super excited to get back to work, to get back to a routine, to get back into high heels for heaven sake! I love my job, I love the people I get to interact with all day...and I know that I need to work, for my own sake. But my gosh, how I am possibly going to leave my two little babies?
So right now, I'm trying to take it slow, trying to take in every little thing. But also trying to leave home a little more...just so that my heart gets used to leaving them.
I am also so very grateful.
So grateful to the company I work for. For allowing me the fully paid time off. To my team, who has had to put in extra time, pick up extra work load...and I am sure, all the balls I dropped - due to my pregnancy brain.
Grateful to have not only spent the time with my babies...but I've been able to spend time with friends. Quick breakfasts and coffee dates have been life saving at times.
Grateful to have friends and family who are literally down the road, and will be there at a drop of a hat in case we need anything.
But most importantly, I am so very grateful to have found a lady to take care of Harper and Jackson. Who already loves our babies. Who I know will look after them, like they are her own. Having her in our life has made me going back to work so much easier.
But, oh my hat...I am going to miss these two little humans.
This might be the hardest thing I do. But it's the right thing for me. For us.
I will be okay.